The big move that many of us make, or have made in the past, for the sole purposes of study comes with its challenges. Some have been through the entire process, while others are undergoing it, and some will do so in the future. I did not just spend my school years in Pakistan, but also finished my undergraduate degree over here. However, being associated with a single place when you consider yourself a person of the world is a very difficult feeling to come to terms with. The thirst to explore the world led me to a destination that I was keen on exploring since I was in university: South Korea. With a decent understanding of the Korean language and an active interest in their popular culture, I believed strongly that I was destined to go East while the world still harps towards the West. This desire eventually led me to enroll in a graduate program in Seoul, leave my job and move to Korea.

Despite a desire to learn more about the world since a very young age, it was never possible to meet people from around the world in Pakistan, which has gradually attracted less tourists and has limited interaction with people of others faiths due to most of the country being Muslim. The opportunity to move to Korea was one I greeted with great enthusiasm because, finally, I would be able to meet all of those people I had read about in books and seen over the Internet- particularly so because my degree is based on International Studies and most of the students enrolled in it are from all across the world; however, all that glitters isn’t gold, and I quickly learnt that people from foreign lands do react the way I expected them to. It was eye opening to learn how certain subtle differences in mannerisms and habits really mark cornerstones of the various cultures from across the globe. Just because I was so deeply fascinated by other people did not mean the others necessarily shared the same emotions, especially if negative preconceived notions were put into the equation.

Thoroughly excited me had to deal with people being made uncomfortable by my cultural references towards them, some of which were likely apt and many were misconceived notions because those revolved around things I had come across on my own. Though people were willing to go a long way to help when it came to figuring out where to go find cheap food or get groceries, somehow, I could see them distancing themselves from me on a social level. Maybe they were unable to react with equal enthusiasm or my excitement was met with a discomfort on their end. However, this did not stop me from me from being myself and expressing myself in front of them all. One of the things that one experiences away from home is developing an understanding about who they are, and where they stand in the world. As I gained this knowledge, I could not back away from owning up to who I am and well, that confidence only helps in the long run because people start seeing you for who you truly are. Instead of being discouraged by others who do not befriend you, it’s a better idea to start having your own fun. Be a friend to yourself, and people will follow you gradually because confidence trumps insecurities.

Just like this, before I knew it, I had started hanging out with people from a multitude of places and friendships ensued. As an international student, that initial isolation may be a good idea as you try to figure out what kind of people you are suited to be around. It takes some time and you might feel a little wounded if you see others spending time in packs without asking you to join in. However, slowly but surely, your niche will reach out to you. It must happen naturally though, since it cannot be willed into happening. But you will not be friendless when abroad, so don’t ever give up on it!